It only matters what works for you.

Archive for December, 2017

Cold things only.

The other day a friend of mine posted to Facebook and used the hashtag #coldthingsonly.

I had a moment of profound and overwhelming empathy. Oh, my friend, I wish you weren’t there. And then a moment of “I thought it was only me, I’m not alone.”

#coldthingsonly is about running out of spoons before the day’s work is done. It means you had enough energy to go to the store (or no choice) but you used up all the energy you had shopping and when you get home, you hurt too much, or don’t have the energy to bring in all the groceries. Just the cold things. The rest will just have to stay in the car until you get back to them. Or urgently need them. Or if you’re very fortunate someone in your life will bring them in for you.

Because, remember, bringing in the cold things isn’t the end of the chore. You have to have the energy to put things away once you’re all in. This is one of the things I know normally healthy people don’t really think about.

Is it selfish to have a moment of comfort because you aren’t the only one? It’s a hard mental place. I don’t want my friends to suffer. I don’t want others to be in pain or exhausted. But there is a small comfort from knowing that someone else can viscerally understand what your situation is. What ever it is.

I’ve got your back my friend.